How do I know when it's time?
Various construction sites, only one employee, me
A zip document is an impossibility
Everything so close yet so far away
Fantasies overpower my desires for physical reality
Out of hands but fully present in my mind
Nothing holds onto me, and yet it's the whole world, me
Surprise shocks my heart
Grief rolls over my face
Anger clenches from my fists
A standstill of time manifests my impotence
Everything outside makes me doubt within
Everything within makes me act outside
When something is set in motion, suddenly everything flows
In one or all directions simultaneously
Nothing ever stays still
Even less so when I want it so much
Thoughts swirl around unanswered questions
Too little time to stop time
Stop
Burning skin, lost hair, wobbling teeth
It's time to say goodbye
Everything that must be will be
Everything that is unnecessary will flow on
For moments, fantasies merge into unexpected facts
It's time to let go